top 10 of the top 40: a humble rebuttal.

oh no you didn't qualler!

10 "ain't no other man."
christina aguilera.

it's like a million fast-paced consecutive punches to the face by a voice that won't take "no i will not bust a move to your musics" for an answer. and like the drumming in pop-punk music videos, i'm pretty sure those horn riffs are sped-up.

9 "when you were young."
the killers.

8 "jesus christ."
brand new.

hasn't quite hit top 40 yet, but this modest mouse meets lite-grunge-emo song has all the makings to be played in department stores and make angsty 14-year-olds have one more reason to keep their sanity while clothes-shopping with mommy. that AND there's no way i genuinely like this enough to make it into the actual top 50 songs of 2006 list. though it did totally change my life.

7 "the adventure."
angels & airwaves.

i have always exhibited adamant hatred for blink-182 in all of their forms. but this is one of those alt-radio songs where they play it pretty infrequently, but still often enough to be excited for it to come on. and that like 3-hour-long outro is the best thing in the world to shout along to at 4 in the morning on the way back from chicago.

6 "mr. me too."
clipse.

5 "move along."
all-american rejects.

one of my favorite things about glossy emo songs is how a song that attempts to have so much "meaning" and "personal agony" attached to it can get so watered down and stripped of its very essence just by the means of overproduction, overkill on the radio, and overly prissy vocals. it's either that that fascinates me, or how my eyes get a little watery as i grip the steering wheel so hard, my hands make a gross "koo-weee" noise when i peel them off the vinyl during the last chorus.

4 "sexyback."
justin timberlake.

"my love" sounds like a song that would be written by the aliens from men in black, whereas "sexyback" sounds like a song that would be (and i apologize for repeating myself from earlier this year) written by chris tucker's character in the fifth element. i liked the fifth element better.

3 "chasing cars."
snow patrol.

i just heard this in home depot while i was excitingly looking at new blinds for the bedroom. i flash-forwarded 10 years and realized how depressing an american middle-class future could be if snow patrol wasn't an integral part of it. qualler's mother reportedly said "they aren't very good" when she heard "the sno-pat" on the radio, and to that i say, "i'm well aware, but not every song can be by panic! at the disco."

2 "irreplaceable."
beyonce.

i bought this song on itunes. i BOUGHT it. for $0.99. i did not download it illegally. i paid MONEY so that i could listen to this as much as i wanted and as soon as humanly possibly. it riled me up THAT MUCH when i heard it for the 4th or 5th time on the radio. aryan r&b is the new authentic r&b. and it's sooooo delicious.

1 "i write sins not tragedies."
panic! at the disco.

duh.

BONUS! #s 35-31 of the top 50 songs of 2006 are now posted at the listulator!

This entry was posted by chris, on Monday, January 15, 2007. You can leave your response.