Hit Me, Baby, One Less Time

Some people in the gossip world are saying that the media should leave Britney Spears alone because she's mentally ill right now and the paparazzi are taking advantage of a sick person. I don't disagree with these people. But it's not the mental illness that gets me, it's that there is absolutely nothing of interest to report. I am SO sick of being constantly updated on Brit's visitations with her kids! Let's face it, she's washed up in terms of being interesting enough to stalk anymore. Her custody battle with KFed over the kids is old news until it gets settled. I don't care how many times she got to see them last month or what a bad mother she is. I don't care that she eats junk food or that she had an awkward dinner with her dad. I'm just gonna go ahead and take a Britney Spears nap. Wake me up when she shaves her head again or flashes her crotch to a camera or maybe when she actually gets it together and makes a new record or gets the kids back.

For now, let's all just reminisce about Brit's early career successes via recreations of her choreographed dances by up-and-coming sluts until she does something noteworthy...

Making of the Hotties

I finally caught up with the new reality show from the creators of The Pussycat Dolls Monday night, which featured a terrible performance of Brit's smash hit, "Hit Me Baby One More Time." In this series the girls are competing to form a new super (hot) music and dance group consisting of three of the show's cast members. And apparently the sexiest name they could come up with for this new group of hot, barely-legal teases is Girlicious. *I don't recommend googling image results for this title at work.*

*Grandma Rant:
[In my best old lady voice] "What ever happened to leaving things up to the imagination? You know, back in my day we believed in not putting it all out there. We liked a little bit of mystery with our sexy. Why don't they just come right out and call them 'The Whores'?" [end rant]

Girlicious, like The Search for the New Doll, is hosted by lovable douche, Mark McGrath, who looks strikingly similar to Sid from Toy Story.



















The group performing the Brit hit came in last in the competition Monday - probably because their performance looked a lot like my middle school slumber party where I forced my friends to dress up and dance like the Spice Girls - and had to send one girl home. The choice came down to Megan or Cassandra, and even though Cassandra was way more off key than Megan, I think she saved her place on the show with the high kick she did in her heels and mini-skirt that seemed to leave a lasting impression with the old creepy male judge. Just goes to show you, I guess, dirty old men will always be able to make a living ogling young girls.

And the paparazzi will continue to make a living reporting the non-events of Britney Spear's life. And I will continue to rant about it all for you. That's all for tonight folks!

This entry was posted by Lady Amy, on Monday, February 25, 2008. You can leave your response.