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Pop Coltura in Italia

So I hear there was some wedding people were talking about on the Blogulator last week. People, that biznass is so old hat. Get over it. What I want to rap at you about today, or, sing in a falsetto to you about, is Italian culture, as well as the culture one runs into whilst in transit. You know, traveling to a destination! (Did I mention that I would also be describing the things Mrs. Qualler and I witnessed in the style of an Italian English language tour guide?) Well, there you have it. Mrs. Qualler and I thankfully had MTV Italia in our hotel room on our Roman holiday, one of the two English language channels. The other was CNN -- you know, the channel that shows news stories!

As it turns out, MTV Italia plays a bizarre mash-up of American piano-playing crooners, dance queens, and bad Euro Pop. Here is what we witnessed:

Rihanna, "Shut Up and Drive"
Man, this chick totally knows what's up in how to make music sorta indie. We saw this video and its energetic style and faux-M.I.A. beats made me not want to poke my eyes out with pizza. Now that would be a tasty way to lose my eyesight. And man, check out that bootie. You know, the slang term for the rear end!
(Link here)

Foo Fighters, "Long Road to Ruin"
Let's all face it -- grunge's answer to Wings has only gotten worse and worse since the grunge era died. And, the Foo Fighters recent output hasn't changed any minds about that fact. But, when I was sleepy and needed the English language, this slice of "hey, remember songs that kinda sound like 'Everlong' during your high school years? Yeah, cool." Who doesn't like nostalgia once in a while? You know, happy memories!

James Blunt, "Same Mistake"
Now, compared to the vast array of music in the world, James Blunt is not a preferable artist. But, his new video has kind of neat cinematography, and there is no piano involved that I can tell. Plus, this song is kind of like a Pete Yorn song, but with a higher voice. So, James Blunt, in the sea of horrible music, yours may be the least horrible. Congratulatons. You know, I am happy for you!

Peter Cincotti, "Goodbye Philadelphia"
I'm not sure how Europeans relate to some generic guy singing about how freedom means a lot to him, but OH MY GOD THE FALSETTO! Falsetto! You know, singing in a high range that isn't utilizing one's vocal cords! He's in so much pain as we get to the ending chorus, and by the end, so am I.

The Fray, "How to Save a Life" and "Over My Head"
I didn't even know that The Fray sang these particular songs. In fact, I thought Five for Fighting sang both of them. "How to Save a Life" is most particularly offensive to me because this video doesn't explain what life we are saving. Who are we saving, baby-faced bald piano playing guy??? (Piano! You know, an instrument used to make faux-artistic pop songs!)

Thankfully, Rome was full of many wonderful sights outside of MTV Italia. You know, places you go to see! But the images of generic piano pop may be burned into my memory forever. At least the world has James Blunt. You know, vaguely inspirational wimp rock!

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  1. Blogger chris | 10:19 AM |  

    i would actually prefer "how to save a life" over james blunt anyday. sure they both sound like they've got lockjaw when they're singing, but i actually think that piano hook in the fray song is catchy enough to drown out the singer's terribleness. whereas blunt's big dumb face and voice is the centerpiece of his "art."

  2. Blogger Brigitte | 2:35 PM |  

    oh chris...you only say that because you didn't hear "how to save a life" over and over and over and over and over and over...though, i would personally say that they are equally as bad. i would rather hear "drops of jupiter"

  3. Blogger Brigitte | 2:35 PM |  

    also...the guy from the fray looks like the baby from Who Framed Roger Rabbit.

  4. Blogger Brigitte | 2:36 PM |  

    also, i missed america. go usa.

  5. Blogger Brigitte | 2:36 PM |  

    america; you know, the country i live in!

  6. Blogger Nicole | 3:30 PM |  

    You can't blame James Blunt for trying to duplicate the success of Damian Rice, with his emotional, British, pathetic (as in pathos), love ballads. It's always raining in England (that's why they wear wellies) and depressing love songs are all they know! Oh, and tea:)

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