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caruso has a way with words and sunglasses.

caruso has done 125 episodes of the same tv show that has basically the same plot every episode. we don't spend much time hating on csi here at the blogulator, because honestly there is not much to hate. forensic something somethings that have immaculate and fashionable wardrobes catch endless amounts of bad guys in a very bold-colors-crayola environment and things get messy, but never too messy. what's there not to like?

the best part, which i did not realize until i saw this youtube collection of "here's the kicker" moments from david caruso's character, hilariously named horatio. (qualler is totally the one who found this clip by the way, so this post is basically his. i just put in the words.)

my favorite patterns to watch for throughout the clip:

1. the sunglasses (obviously)

he is always looking off into nowhere right before he puts them on, then puts them on, as if to say (in addition to "i kick ass"), "i have no idea where to look when i say something that is generally awesome and not direction toward anyone in particular, so i will conceal my confusion with my shades."

2. the pause(s)

of course you need a pause right before a kicker like "i'll be your memory," but caruso's pause is unique. the follow up is not emphatic nor is the pause for too long. it's almost as if it is a slight hesitation rather than just a "check out how awesome i can use words." it's more like "check out how awesome i can use words and yet i don't even care that much about how awesomely i use them. i just open my mouth and genius spills out." and sometimes he throws in an extra pause or two just to make sure you're paying attention.

3. the hands on the hips

where else do the hands go after you put on the shades? in your pockets? can't, they're full of blackberries and iphones. through your hair? your red locks accentuate themselves. on your hips? that's the ticket, you are so hot no one will care if your fingertips touch your bottom just a little bit. and your shoulders (possibly padded by your blazer) aim toward the sky, just like your detective character.

4. the lean, followed by the walkaway

so subtle, yet so effective. he puts his weight on one foot right before the pause, then as his body falls back the other way, he delivers his "hell yeah he said that" as he simultaneously gets the eff outta that crime scene. why waste time lingering around the joint when there's bad guys to talk softly to and squint at?

and as i watch this, jerksica gets angry: "who has time to make a video like this? better yet, who has time to WATCH this? better yet, who has time to WATCH this TWICE? better yet, who has time to WATCH this TWICE, then BLOG about it?!?!?!" she has a valid point, and yet, i have no regrets.

speaking of youtube, our good friend and fellow blogulutioneer p. arty's recent return to the blogging world and new blogging mission is what inspired me to finally get around to figuring out how to "embed" a youtube video. do yourself a favor and watch/read his blog.

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  1. Blogger qualler | 11:53 PM |  

    Just to clarify, it was Paal who showed me the link, so props to him.

  2. Blogger Wipert | 8:04 PM |  

    Wow now I realize I couldn't watch this show past the opening credits.

  3. Blogger P. Arty | 9:21 AM |  

    Love the video! And the use of YouTube, although you're really stealing my thunder here.

  4. Anonymous molly | 7:10 PM |  

    Excellent video find.
    David Caruso in CSI: Miami is about 2 parts Columbo to 10 parts annoying. Also, wasn't he in "Twins"? And for that he shall never be forgiven.

  5. Blogger BJ | 5:44 PM |  

    Hey – since you’re a YouTuber, you might want to check this out… There’s a video company that’s recruiting
    YouTubers and if they like your stuff, (and they should) they will actually pay you when your video gets a hit.
    Here’s their link… www.flownetworkproductions.com/videorevenue.htm. It’s about time the people who make
    the videos get some of the money instead of it all going to YouTube!

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