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Top 10 Guilty Pleasures

10. I Know Who Killed Me
A horror film with Lindsay Lohan is good. A horror film with Lindsay Lohan wearing a robotic arm? Now that's brilliant. Who is Aubrey? Is she the sweet girl next door? Or is she a the stripping daughter of a dead crack-head? OR IS SHE BOTH?!?!!? OMG! This film has got it all: Twist after predictable twist, weird references to non-religious stigmatic twins, a dude getting his arm crushed and ripped off, and some of the tamest torture sequences this side of Network Television. Oh, and did I mention drawn-out sequences of Lindsay Lohan stripping?? Sounds like this film adds up to one guilt-filled pleasure. And I know it (winks).
--Sean

9. Pokémon
I've caught a lot of 'em. Not 'em all, but a lot. Although everyone has heard of Pokémon, I'd wager that only 2% of Americans my age (24) and above have actually played the games. Coincidentally, that is the same 2% who are interested in what kind of UFO Dennis Kucinich saw. 'Tis a shame so few have tried it, considering that the series is actually quite good. Personally, I clocked in over 82 hours of gameplay on 2007's Pokémon Diamond version. A waste of time? No way, because the genius of it all is that I was almost always doing something else at the same time. Whether in transit, watching bad TV with my parents, or (most frequently) sobbing through another Baltimore Orioles loss, the relaxed pace of the gameplay allowed me to accomplish great things at the same time I was triumphantly capturing Pikachus and Bidoofs. Also, with the newly-introduced online trading system, I am finally able to take the high road, trading Pokémon with kids way younger than me not face-to-face, but rather online! Resulting from this innovation, however, is the most guilty aspect of this pleasure: Kids will trade almost anything for Pikachus. Countless times I successfully offered this rather common species in order to acquire an ultra-rare, one-of-a-kind Pokémon. It may be sad, but don't worry. I'm keeping records of who these dumb kids are so as to be sure never to hire them when they are grown-ups like me.
--DoktorPeace

8. "Stronger" by Kanye West
Good God I love Daft Punk. When Daft Punk is mixed with one of the few "acceptable" rap artists for people like me to listen to, then you knowz I'm gonna dance ironically to it. And there are so many different ironic ways to dance to this one -- doing the robot (or, as the Flight of the Conchords might suggest, the robo-boogie). Or you can do the worm. Or, you can try your damndest to actually look cool while dancing. Maybe that's the best guilty pleasure of all.
--Qualler

7. "Bones"
My love of this show started off innocently enough. This fall I just happened to always be home at this time on Tuesday nights eating dinner and so I would turn on the TV. After awhile, the sharp tongue of Temperence Brennan and the sexual undertones in her relationship with FBI partner, Booth, got to me. In addition to the suspense and mystery that comes with a crime solving show, I became attached to the characters and was hooked. What can I say? I'm going to keep watching and wondering, "will Bones and Booth ever get it on? Probably not, as that would completely ruin the dynamic that makes the show interesting.
--Lady Amy

6. "Heroes"
It is indeed not a good show anymore. Which of course makes me question whether it ever was. Regardless, it's addictive, has fun characters, and even funner (it's a word!) story lines. And if the characters or the story lines start sucking, making fun of the show with fellow Heroes addicts becomes even better than actually watching the show. Plus, with 24 just being boring now, this is the only show where a big group of friends and I can joyously shout at the TV screen when something ridiculous happens.
--Chris

5. The Best Damn Thing by Avril Lavigne
If I had any cajones at all, I would have voted this album as my top album of 2007. Taking the loud guitars of her last album Under My Skin, minus the angst of the last album, plus a million Avrils as mall-punk cheerleaders, you've got yourself one beautiful piece of candy food music. Listening to this album feels like eating my favorite homemade food mixture -- Annie's macaroni and cheese, mixed with Roundy's brand chicken nuggets, mixed with a little real cheddar cheese, just a dab of barbecue sauce, and love. I feel a little sick, a little guilty afterwards, but when it's over, I am going to tell my friends about how great it is. They're going to make a face at me, like I'm disgusting, but I know in my heart that I'm right.
--Qualler

4. "That's How You Know" by Amy Adams
Besides every song performed in Once, this is the only absolutely spellbinding musical number in a movie this year. Enchanted itself was cute, but that's about it. This song, though, wowee zowee. Steel drums, a catchier-than-thou refrain, meticulously layered vocal harmonies, na-na-nas in the last chorus, this song has everything anyone could ever want from an over-the-top choreographed song in a sugary Disney movie. I'd go so far as to say it's the best song in a children's movie EVER.
--Chris

3. "Beverly Hills, 90210" - Seasons 2 and 3 on DVD
Finally released on DVD after some legal difficulties involving music rights (EDITORS NOTE: by legal difficulties, Brigitte of course means the Spelling family is too cheap to cough up the cash to pay residuals for the real music!), the second season is even more drama-packed than the first! While season one revolved around the Walsh family's move from Minneapolis to Beverly HIlls (as Brenda puts it, "nothing was ever this complicated in Minneapolis, Brandon"), in the second season all the characters get their own story lines, and what story lines they are! From date rape to gun control to a boy's search for his birth mom, the over the top drama just keeps on a-coming. It's impossible to watch just one episode at a time. Season Three, also released in 2007, only got more over the top and wonderful. Now seniors, our heroes face the usual problems: eating disorders, car bombs, illegal drag racing, and becoming a model. But, when all is said and done, will they make it to graduation and learn that the most important lesson of all is the lesson of friendship? Senior Year!
--Brigitte

2. "America's Next Top Model"
This cycle of ANTM dealt with a long neglected issue: autism and the fashion industry. But let's not beat a dead horse. Autism aside, the series delivered just as much drama and laughs as those which preceded it and, hopefully, those will shall follow. As long as there are people who enjoy watching wanna be models look like idiots and step all over each other to be on top, there will be ANTM. Other highlights include the makeovers, the inevitable crying because someone doesn't like her makeover, the ridiculous tasks that have nothing to do with modeling but for some reason the models must master, and the moments when the audience is supposed to see how difficult modeling is because sometimes they have to sit around and wait for a long time...or wake up very early...or do anything else that everybody does at any normal job without crying about it. And, of course, there are the judges, who bring almost as much punch to the show as do the contestants. Tyra, of course, but also Mr. J, Ms. J, and Twiggy. It's so comforting, in a strange way, to see that Twiggy ended up looking just like any other middle aged soccer mom on the block. This series will always be a guilty pleasure, and though I know deep down I despise what the series seems to stand for, I so very much wanna be on top!
--Brigitte

1. "Gossip Girl"
In past posts, I said little to nothing about GG other than "breathtaking" or some generic word to describe my demented and obsessive relationship with the show. There's not really much to say, that's why. First there was Beverly Hills 90210, then Dawson's Creek, then The O.C. and now there's Gossip Girl. The characters are bitchier, smugger, richer, and better than ever. This is why teenagers hate themselves. And it's oh so sweet.
--Chris

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  1. Blogger Unknown | 9:43 AM |  

    Wow, Chris, best song in a children's movie EVER?! I know hyperbole is frequently used in this blog, but even that is pushing it, what with a song that is essentially a "Kiss the Girl" from The Little Mermaid knockoff!

  2. Blogger Brigitte | 10:24 AM |  

    i think the best song in a children's show would have to be "who is he kissing" featured in an episode of jem and the holograms, because it deals with alter egos and emotional infidelity, two things which children really can identify with. i guess that's not a movie, though...so we're stepping into a different category. chris, you've made me want to see enchanted. damn you.

  3. Blogger Sean | 11:11 AM |  

    i just can't wait to be king
    the lion king

    discussion is over.

  4. Blogger chris | 11:15 AM |  

    Wow some people are stuck in the 90s. And while I will concede to the similarities to "Kiss the Girl," that song doesn't even nearly equal in sheer number of layered harmonies, much less the emotional resonance of said harmonies. Plus, Amy Adams is real and thus more likely to get with me, unlike that tease Ariel.

    P.S. Regardless, "Under the Sea" is still the better Little Mermaid song.

  5. Blogger Brigitte | 12:27 PM |  

    if we're talking about best little mermaid song, the obvious answer is part of your world.

    and sean--i just can't wait to be king? really?

  6. Blogger Sean | 12:51 PM |  

    absolutely. it's got everything, spoken elements, animals jumping all over, a duet like nature. plus it sets up all the greatness to follow. simba doesn't become king until way later, he has to fight his demons. it's a struggle.

    i guess i like that "be out guest" song, too. from B&tB. oh, and "tale as old as time, something that will rhyme, beauty and the beast"
    1990's had the best disney stuff. nowadays there's too much tongue-in-cheek adult humor spoiling everything. and mike myers? F@#$ him.

  7. Blogger Unknown | 1:09 PM |  

    I agree that "Kiss the Girl" is not even the best song in The Little Mermaid -- I would agree with Brigitte that "Part of Your World" is beautiful, poignant, and also serves the story remarkably well.

    But, are we all forgetting the true titan of Disney songs? Of course, I am talking about "Friend Like Me" from Aladdin. Duh, Robin Williams is so funny!

  8. Blogger Nicole | 6:27 PM |  

    The early 90's were definitely the hey-day of Disney musicals. Even so, I like the love song from "Robin Hood,"and all the music in "Oliver & Company!"

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