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Emmy Shmemmy Phlemmy, Why Nerdflix Is Bomb (pay us anytime, Netflix!) and Sweaty People.

As you may have heard, the 2007 Emmy nominations were recently announced, and as our new blog friend Neal Justin from the (Minneapolis) Star Tribune aptly stated, reading the Emmy nominations is "like going to the dentist: you have to do it, but it's usually painful." Now, I'm not one to give a crap about who actually wins the Emmys, because, let's face it, when Everybody Loves Raymond is the best comedic show on television for many years in a row according to these viewers, I might as well start tuning into the new TBS family sitcom, "The Bill Engvall Show" which has been obnoxiously advertised on IMDb for the past week. But I digress. I am here today to bitch to you about who didn't get nominated for anything but should have, and who did get nominated but shouldn't have. I bet no blogger has done the same yet.

Best Drama nominations: Boston Legal, Grey's Anatomy, House, Heroes, The Sopranos. Now, I'm not about to get into another pro vs. anti-Heroes bit here, and I'm not even going to argue that it was a big hit show in its first season. But, of the five shows nominated here, I think only one deserves to be called "best drama" (DUH, The Sopranos!) While The Sopranos had five or so of its best episodes of its entire run in its 9 episode season, Boston Legal showed creepy James Spader and whacked-out William Shatner for an hour every night. House does the same crap every week ("I may be doing this particular medical procedure unethically but I'm saving a person's life, dammit!"), and Grey's Anatomy had that whole "faggot" news story attached to it. Who should have been nominated, you ask? That's easy. "The Wire," "Rescue Me," and "The Sopranos," "Big Love" and, alright, "Heroes," I guess. But whatever. They can't all be wittily-written, well-developed dramas that supercede their premises (especially not "Heroes"! Zing! Yeah, I bet you thought Hiro was going to get out of this one unscathed.)

Meanwhile, in the news today, Netflix (or, our belovedly called Nerdflix) announced that they were lowering their prices for the 3-at-a-time and 1-at-a-time plans to $16.99 and $8.99, respectively. I could not be more pleased, until I realized that this change made the Netflix homepage so awesome that it crashed all day today. Now, let me ask you, what am I supposed to do when I'm working and I suddenly realize, "Hey, you did watch the first five minutes of the short-lived Showtime series 'Jeremiah' starring Luke Perry and Malcolm-Jamal Warner and hated it, so you better give it (a) one star (rating on the Netflix user rating system scale of one to five stars)?" And don't even get me started on how Blockbuster's "business model" is "better" because "you can go to the store and rent movies AND also get them in the mail." When a marketing campaign such as Netflix's sucks me in this good, there's no way I'll ever shop at a crappy Blockbuster store again. (Dear Netflix, we take cash either in the form of dollar bills or in the form of Qdoba gift cards. Thank you.)

Meanwhile, in town last night was former Blogulator favorites Jimmy Eat World (who played at the Fine Line Music Cafe in Minneapolis, July 23.) I can't really give a good, honest review of the concert, because it wa so forgettable that I actually forgot I had gone to it a few minutes after I had left (if I had been looking for a concert in which a formerly great rock band played no actual songs that "rocked", I would have listened to their albums through a slow-motion Talkboy.) However, one great discovery was made today -- lead singer Jim Adkins is the Sweatiest Man in the World. When I realized that the highlight of the show was when he shook his head once and beads of sweat shot from every angle of his head, I immediately ranked him a 5 on a scale of 1 to 5 in terms of sweatiness. Later, it was determined that we could create the Jim Adkins sweat scale. If Jim Adkins of Jimmy Eat World is a 5, then Jon Lovitz is a 4, Bruce Willis is a 3, Pierce Brosnan is a 2, and Clay Aiken is a 1. Only King Tut, who is a mummy and is dead, sweats less than all of those people. So remember, if you're pretty dang sweaty, but not too sweaty, you're probably Bruce Willis. It all makes sense in my head.

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  1. Blogger Michael | 3:24 AM |  

    I had Netflix about a year ago and switched Blockbuster, for the simple reason that Netflix kept sending me cracked discs. While it's great that I can report my cracked disc with Netflix, and they'll ship me another disc within a few days. With Blockbuster, I can take that same broken disc (haven't received any broken discs yet from them) and take it back to one of their stores and get another movie to watch right away. This holds true for returning any movie to Blockbuster. I take my movie in the envelope to a Blockbuster store and exchange it for another movie. But what also happens is that the Blockbuster employee scans my disc, which sends that data to their online system, which immediately sends out the next disc in my online queue (which arrives in 1-3 days, the same time as Netflix did). That leaves me with another movie from my queue to watch while I wait for my next movie to be shipped out. Blockbuster also gives you 1-2 coupons per month good for free in store rentals. I have the 1 out at time unlimited plan at Blockbuster, and I receive the same amount or more movies I did with Netflix's 2 out at a time unlimited plan. In my queue which has 161 movies, 4 are on short wait, with 1 on long wait. I had at least 10-20 movies on some kind of wait with Netflix. Not to mention that Netflix would send out "less popular" movies from shipping centers like Albuquerque, New Mexico for "In the Bedroom." Don't get me wrong; I liked Netflix a lot. Their online rating system is far superior to Blockbuster's. But I'll gladly pay the extra $1 a month for the time being until Blockbuster lowers their prices, to get more movies per month. Pretty much all I do is watch movies at work because I work 3rd shift, so I want more movies for my money.

  2. Blogger Michael | 3:35 AM |  

    I think that I've let my opinion be known here, in a quite long and boring post. But I forgot to mention that I have had instances with Blockbuster where I have taken a movie back to the store in the morning, received another movie in exchange for the movie that I just watched, and the following day I had the next movie in my online queue in my mailbox. It doesn't happen often, but it has happened to me a few times.

  3. Blogger Unspar! | 8:34 AM |  

    Clay Aiken! Great call!

  4. Blogger qualler | 9:14 AM |  

    a) Blockbuster has crappier selection. Netflix has excellent selection.
    b) I hate going to Blockbuster stores.
    c) I love instant viewing.
    d) Blockbuster's logo is stupid and they reduced the size of their stores.

  5. Blogger P. Arty | 9:56 AM |  

    Big Love? No thanks. You did forget TV's Lost, though. The constant upward trend of the last season was phenomenal!

    So JEW isn't worth seeing? I've never seen them, and I'm torn about going tonight. I think it would be wroth the 35 bucks and standing through The Middle just to be able to witness For Me This Is Heaven.

  6. Blogger qualler | 10:28 AM |  

    Unless you're ready to sit through The Middle ACOUSTIC and a bunch of songs off of Futures ACOUSTIC and hear For Me This is Heaven in between lethargic versions of other songs, skip it!

  7. Blogger chris | 1:57 PM |  

    i say go just because you've never seen them before. i don't regret going. it was depressing, but it was in a small venue and i got to have a little nostalgia trip.

    that's really weird about cracked nerdflix discs. i've never gotten a cracked disc.

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