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Oh Zach Braff, you are such a card!

Did you know that Zach Braff, the writer/director/star of such hit films like Garden State and Chicken Little as well as star of hit NBC sit-drama-com Scrubs HAS HIS OWN BLOG?! Well, he does, and the little rascal just updated his! If anybody should get credit for the blogolution, I think Mr. Braff should take it all. Below is a screen shot of his latest post, a video blog:


This screen shot tells me many things. First, Zach Braff is cool enough to have not only a blog, but to post his blog postings as a VIDEO! That means, you can watch him say things about his upcoming projects, and he'll even throw in an adorable look or two. Second, he has his arms up in the air, as if he's saying, "Hey, check it out, it's me! I don't have a care in the world, except to make my fans happy." Third, he seems to be pointing to a wreath of some sort, showing that even though he's a Jew, he's still down with Christmas. Four, he don't care about dressing up for his blogs -- he just wears what everyone wears, an olive green t-shirt and a regular guy look! Five, he lets his fans comment on his posts.

Among the commenters this time around were the usual suspects -- big time Zach Braff lovers. But, then again, who couldn't love him? He's just so adorable, yet deep:

As you can see, the icons (Princess Leia and Han Solo; Natalie Portman in Garden State) show that his fans like things that not all people like, such as Star Wars and Garden State. Also, they are very up with the action verbs, such as *sigh* and *wink*. And I found some comments that I think Zach could use as inspiration for his next film!

First off, this person's name is "lawn_gnome87". In this day in age of fast food, minivans, and high technology, who has time for quirky yet likeable things like land(_)gnome(87)'s? This person does! Also, this person uses emoticons, such as smiley and frowny faces, showing that he/she is not afraid to show their true emotions. I wonder who will respond to this question?

Ooh, burn. First, this person's name, "tame_the_cunt" shows that he/she is a take-no-prisoners type of person. Not only is this a catchy reference to Paul Thomas Anderson's 1999 masterpiece Magnolia, people who are a bit less informed than he/she may be put off by his/her edginess. Second, this commenter has the obligitory camera in the picture, meaning that he/she is too edgy to have somebody else take the picture of him/her, and also, he/she is artistic because he/she takes pictures with his/her digital camera. Third, a sassy comment is left in response to the original ("Try watching the video."), showing that he/she is damn sick of these happy people prancing around and being happy.


But it doens't matter! The lawn_gnome87 pays no heed to sassy comments and instead respons with a sincere answer. Also, the use of yet another emoticon shows that he/she is still sad, but not about the sassy comment left by tame_the_cunt.


Now it looks like tame_the_cunt has been, indeed, tamed. While he/she still does not succumb to the overall happy whims of the lawn_gnome, he/she feels obliged to give this person a factual answer when determining that he/she is unable to view the aforementioned video.

Now the lawn_gnome is happy, and nothing can stop him/her from doing a happy dance. How tame_the_cunt reacts to this happy dance is still a mystery. Perhaps, Mr. Braff, you could fill in the holes? Pun INTENDED.

Cheers to Zach Braff, for bringing out the best in film, art, and internet flame wars!

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  1. Blogger Unspar! | 4:26 PM |  

    This is about the most brilliant analysis of anything ever. Emoticon.

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