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What are the Kids Up To: Just One More Episode to Go!

Yes, you heard me right--this week, the second to last episode of the season (yes, it is renewed!) of Secret Life of the American Teenager aired. We are now 9/10ths of the way through what went from a "hey, this might be good" to "well, it's entertainingly bad" to "wow I can't believe I'm watching this" and still I persevere for you, the blogger. I feel like, at this point in the season, I have to just grit my teeth and finish what I've started. But before we dive into tonight's episode, I'd like to present for you a list of things I'd rather do that watch SLAT.

Things I'd Rather Do Than Watch Secret Life of the American Teenager:
1. Watch reruns of 7th Heaven. Even though this show makes me REALLY angry, the acting and plot lines, compared to SLAT, seem brilliant.

2. Listen to Qualler talk about Deadwood. Although I have yet to give this show a second chance (seemed like a snoozefest to me!) I'd rather hear Qualler talk about how brilliant the series is than watch more SLAT.

3. Talk about watching Greek. Someday I'll actually watch Greek. I've got quite a bit of it stored up on the ol' DVR, and every time I see a commercial for the new season, which premiered this week, I remember how much I want to start watching it, but so far...I've been too busy watching other things that I feel obligated to finish. Darn my work ethic!

And now for some of this week's highlights (because at this point plot doesn't matter). I would announce a Spoiler Alert, but I don't think anyone should care about this show.

This week's episode was directed by Jason Priestley! Thanks to the magic of DVR, Qualler and I were able to watch his name appear on the screen over and over, just as the younger sister says "doubt it" in a complete monotone. It's pretty wonderful to hear "doubt it" repeated about seven times and see "Directed by Jason Priestley" while laughing and laughing. I guess this is why he couldn't appear on the new 90210 (premiering next Tuesday!!). He's too busy directing SLAT episodes.

"How hard is it not to get pregnant?" OK, it's lines like that one that make me love this show and its overly obvious message to American families everywhere.

Uh-oh, Ricky (the baby daddy) is trying to get with...one of Amy's friends (not the annoying redhead, the African-American one). Her name doesn't matter. Don't listen to Ricky, obligatory minority character! I smell trouble...

The slutty girl is trying to find her dad. Big surprise--slut has father issues. Interestingly (and I use that word very loosely), Christian girl is helping her out. Looks like they're becoming friends, despite their differences! Sadly, her dad does not want her to be in his life, and tells her never to come around again. Lucky for Slut she has a new friend to console her.

The dorky guy's dad still wants them to get married...Amy's mom isn't so sure. For some reason they're eating pizza and drinking wine together--I smell another romance! Come to think of it, there's been lots and lots of pizza eating this week. And lots and lots of crossover romances: Slut's mother and Amy's dad, Young Bob Sagat's dad and Amy's mom, Male Asian friend and Amy's little sister, and African American female friend and Ricky (baby daddy). This is getting confusing.

The Christian's girls brother, who has down syndrome, seems to have hired a prostitute, played by Jennifer Coolidge...she told him that it would cost him money if he wanted her to be his friend. I'm not sure if I get how this happened. One can order a prostitute, like a pizza, and she'll arrive at your door? The world we live in! And, she's not a nice prostitute...she tells him about how mean her pimp is and how drugs are bad, and how if he doesn't pay her bad guys will come into his home and beat up his family. This dialogue (like all the dialogue in all the scenes...) takes place over soothing, piano soft jazz. Yet another terrific move by Priestley (I can only assume he chose the music). The senseless, inappropriate music really highlights the senselessness and inappropriateness that is an American teenager's life.

What can I conclude about the American teenager based on this week's episode: Um...I'm actually left pretty confused about this after tonight's episode. I guess I can still conclude that most young boys want to get married if a girl they like becomes pregnant, Christians and sluts can become friends after all, and everyone loves pizza.

Just one more week to go!!

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  1. Blogger qualler | 10:23 PM |  

    Deadwood = not a snoozefest! Watch two episodes and you'll be cursing like Al Swearengen, you c***s***er f***ing Chinese Dentist!!

  2. Anonymous Jane | 10:59 PM |  

    Whoever decided to put Brigitte in the basement at work is a c***s***er f***ing Chinese Dentist.



    ...Go Obama!!

  3. Blogger chris | 10:01 AM |  

    I WANT TO WATCH DEADWOOD.

    I bet Priestley signed onto the job because the prostitute scene reminded him of that one 90210 (old version - are we really going to have to put this in parentheses every time we talk about the original 90210 now?) episode where they call a stripper on a rainy day while the girls go follow around Color Me Badd, but pull a Travis Bickle and "just want to talk" instead, especially since Andrea comes over and then they have to pretend she's Steve's cousin or something. Man, rainy days in Beverly Hills are AWESOME.

  4. Blogger Brigitte | 10:07 AM |  

    haha, i remember that episode...what a great one. i really like that color me bad performs at the peach pit, just for donna, since she missed the show and is such a fan...that's also the episode when we learn that donna's mom is having an affair!

  5. Blogger DoktorPeace | 11:23 AM |  

    You could call it 90210riginal.

    I had a pretty good time watching Deadwood. It was interesting, at least, and made me want to visit the city. The plot isn't too much to speak of (as it's supposed to be?), but as a character study it does an amazing job. Al Swearengen may be the best single character since the Bionic Woman (original, joke).

  6. Blogger DoktorPeace | 11:25 AM |  

    Or 90210ld is easier.

  7. Blogger qualler | 1:43 PM |  

    I've changed my mind -- I love this show again! Especially because of lines like "How hard is it not to get pregnant?"

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