Tweet that Shi*: Bachelor Edition!!!

Here are some highlights from my nonexistent twitter feed, ya'll:

@bachelorhood: I am making you a titled edition. This means nothing.

@technology: You have betrayed me, killing off my laptop, television, and more this year. My future electronics will be made of wood.

@number6: Watching The Prisoner, I see you are everywhere. And you always manage to look good.


@abstraction: I often miss the point.

@strippers: The internet has made your reality largely irrelevant, especially given that you want my real dollars.

@allgirls: This goes for you, too.

@TheHangover: You are our generation's Animal House, and I mean that in the worst way (not having seen Animal House).

@precociousScott: Yeh have a new king, and he is woonderful.



@rhetoric: My American accent makes me seem dumb, so I'm going to effect a British one in order to sound like a British idiot.

@ofcourse: According to Google images, I share my desire for tree-based technology with over 3 million others who have posted pics of "wooden robots."

@whichmeans: If it's on the web, then somebody's touched themselves to it.

@conclusion: Ewoks.

@furries: My friends think I'm one of you. Little do they know, I am you. But I guess you wouldn't know that either.


@mystomach: I'm sorry for punching you in the shower a short time ago. I wanted to see if it would hurt.

@rapejokes: I understand why some people don't like you, but I can't help if you always remind me of a good joke.

@mylife: I'm watching you float away, 140 characters at a time.

@NominativePronoun9: Your overuse reveals my ego, but this tweet reveals my awareness. Put together, I'm almost a hipster.

@thekillers: Nah, I'm just a human. Dancing sucks.

This entry was posted by DoktorPeace, on Friday, August 28, 2009. You can leave your response.