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Kids Today: A Book Review

Hey blog readers! Some time ago I promised a review of Lauren Conrad’s debut novel L.A. Candy, which tells the tale of a young naïve blond girl (not Lauren) who moves to L.A. to pursue her career and ends up the star of a hit reality series (not The Hills).

Qualler and I took turns (and by took turns I mean I did it one time) reading this book aloud to each other before falling asleep. And if you need something to put you to sleep, this is definitely the book. It felt like falling asleep to another boring episode of The Hills (and I mean that in the best way possible).

This was indeed a great book to fall asleep to, and it was fun to hear it read aloud and imagine Lauren--er--Jane in all her L.A. situations. However, that's about as much as I can say for the book's virtues. The very art of storytelling seems to be lost in overly detailed descriptions of what people are wearing and how attractive someone is. Much like the show that this book is in no way directly based on, nothing really happens, but all the description sort of steps in where all the production happens in the show in order to trick the viewer/reader into thinking that something happened. And with each chapter, just as with each episode, the reader/viewer things that something is just about to happen...but it never really does.

I am a complex person. I do not understand why I enjoy certain things. I think for me certain forms of entertainment reach me in an almost sub (or pre) conscious sort of way. And so, Qualler and I have begun reading the second book in her (at least three book) series, Sweet Little Lies: An L.A. Candy Novel. It picks up right where the last book left off and provides quite a bit of recap, just like the each new episode of The Hills. Because, why trust the viewer/reader?

And now, some Avatar fan fiction. (Editor's note: James Cameron better be taking some tips from Brigitte when he undertakes his planned Avatar prequel novel.)

Jake did feel better knowing that someone who really knew Pandora, someone like Tsu’Tey, would know what the next steps had to be. He wanted to feel like things would only get better from here, and he wanted to know that Tsu’Tey was on his side now…but Jake never really liked him. From the time they first met, Tsu’Tey had been difficult and unwelcoming. And the fact that Jake stole his girl didn’t really help things, either. However, when push came to shove and Jake needed cooperation to save the Na’vi people from complete destruction, Tsu’Tey had put his hurt feelings aside to help. But could he be counted on again?

Jake Sully knew from experience that in times of war, men could always put aside their differences and unite against a common enemy. But now that the war had ended and the immediate danger of that common enemy was gone, would Tsu'Tey make Jake his enemy once again? Jake eyed him. He was surrounded by a group of about 20 men, and he was giving orders and dividing up jobs. The men hung on his every word, and Jake began to worry. Would Tsu'Tey be his second in command or would he go back to being his greatest rival? The people were grateful that Jake had helped so much during the war, but perhaps they would forget his heroic acts now that the war had ended. Perhaps he would go back to being the outsider he once was. Jake knew that he had come to Pandora, not by mistake, but in order to lead these people through a very difficult time. But would the people be as sure as Jake was about his place among them?

Jake’s worries were interrupted by a hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Neytiri, searching his worried eyes with her own. She seemed to know exactly what he was thinking. “Don’t worry, Jake,” she said to him in a low voice. “Tsu’Tey will do what is right for his people. And he knows now that you are right—that you are the true leader. He respects you now.”

Jake feigned a small smile. He was glad that Neytiri believed in him once again, but it would take a bit more time before he could really trust himself. He still felt at least in part responsible for the war beginning in the first place. He glanced over at Tsu’Tey, who was now standing alone after sending his men on their various missions. Tsu’Tey must have felt his glance, for he suddenly returned it, and as their eyes met Jake once again saw the anger and fear in Tsu’Tey’s eyes. He shivered, and quickly looked away.

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  1. Blogger Papa Thor | 8:43 AM |  

    Hey Brigitte, does human Jake still live in that pod or did he get mother earth to transfer him permanently to his avatar like they tried to do with Ripley? I think he should put the pod in his pocket and carry it around, that would be a weird existential twist, wouldn't it?
    I think for your PhD you should just write more fan fiction!

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